A Conversation With the Devil
We Had a Hell of a Talk
Devil: “Hey, Norm, how’s it hangin’?”
Norm: “Oh hey, Devil, how’re you doing?”
Devil: “Oh, not bad —— wait a minute. You know who I am?”
Norm: “Sure I do, you’re the Devil. The Prince of Darkness. Beelzebub. Mephistopheles ——”
Devil: “Okay ——”
Norm: “Satan. Lucifer. El Diablo —— “
Devil: “All right, all right, I get it. You know who I am. But how did you know?”
Norm: “Well, you have horns, a tail, a pitchfork, and a flaming red hue. It seems kind of obvious.”
Devil: “No, I mean only believers acknowledge my existence. I thought you didn’t believe in Heaven and Hell, and God and the Devil, and all of that.”
Norm: “That’s true, I don’t believe in any of that stuff. Seeing you is just my little pea-sized brain playing tricks on me. It’s like a dream, you know? My brain is simply emptying its dusty closets of any stray thoughts that have accumulated. That’s all it is. Guess that makes you a Dust Devil.”
Devil: “Ha, good one. But, are you sure?”
Norm: “About what?”
Devil: “Are you sure I’m not really The Devil, standing right here before you, preparing to take you off to Hell, where you will burn for all eternity for your many sins committed here on Earth?”
Norm: “Yeah, man. I’m not the least bit worried about that.”
Devil: “How can you be so sure?”
Norm: “Where’s the proof?”
Devil: “Proof?”
Norm: “Yeah, show me some proof of your dastardly powers.”
Devil: “Well, I could point to the most recent Presidential election and the impending demise of your precious democracy ——”
Norm: “Screw you.”
Devil: “Awww, still a little sensitive about that, huh? Okay, let me ask you this: Isn’t the fact that the world is so fucked up, proof enough? Don’t you see all the evil that’s going on in the world? Doesn’t the suffering of innocents prove my existence?”
Norm: “Nah. I’ll agree the world is a fucked up place. And, I do believe in good and evil. But, I don’t believe the universal struggle between good and evil has anything to do with supernatural beings battling it out for supremacy over the Earth and all of its inhabitants. Nope, can’t go for that.”
Devil: “Don’t you think good and evil have to come from somewhere?
Norm: “It’s the way humans are, bud. Some humans are good. Some humans are evil. Most all of us are some of both. Dealing with the good and the bad is just part of a human being’s life. Are you claiming, Dev, that anything bad that happens here on Earth, is because of you? That you are the force of evil and the genesis of all the bad stuff that goes on? That humans do not have freewill to act as they do, whether good or bad?”
Devil: “Yes, that is exactly what I’m saying.”
Norm: “Jesus Christ, you are quite full of yourself, aren’t you?”
Devil: “What did you say?”
Norm: “Oops, sorry about that. It just slipped out. I was not calling you the martyred son of your enemy, the almighty, powerful God, ruler of Heaven and Earth. I was simply blaspheming, as I am prone to do every now and then.”
Devil: “I think you did that on purpose. I think you knew exactly what you were doing.”
Norm: “Yeah, okay, busted. I guess I was yanking your chain a little bit, Dev. What’s the matter? Can’t take a joke? Are your feelings hurt? Should I have a little Sympathy for the Devil? Are you now going to burn me to a cinder for my insolence?”
Devil: “No, no, it’s cool. Sympathy for the Devil, huh? Next time I see Mick and the boys, I’ll let them know you’re a fan. Anyway, despite what you may have heard, I am actually quite reasonable, and I appreciate a good joke. You’ve heard of a devilish sense of humor, haven’t you?”
Norm: “Yes, I have, Dev, yes I have. In fact, there are those who would say, I myself exhibit a devilish sense of humor from time to time.”
Devil: “Yeah, I am well aware.”
Norm: “So, Devil, since you’re here and we are having this conversation just like a couple of guys hanging out, let me ask you a question - What is the end game between you and God? I mean, with God being so almighty and powerful, aren’t you afraid that at some point, he’ll just wipe you out and rid the world of all evil, turning the Earth into an Eden of peace and beauty and love and goodness?”
Devil: “Ha, now that’s funny! It didn’t quite go as planned the first time he tried that, did it? And, anyway, it ain’t never going to happen again! You know why? God needs me! How is anyone going to know how valuable and precious, peace and beauty and love and goodness are, if there’s no war and ugliness and hate and evil to compare them to? Why would anyone need to worship and love God without having someone like me to fear? God uses the threat of the Devil and Hell to keep the flock on his side.”
Norm: “Well, Dev, I never thought about it like that before. You make some good points, I guess, although I suspect a truly religious person would know how to counter them. I just have never really understood the whole religion thing. I know faith in God works for many, many people. I am not one of them. I’ve pretty much always been a non-believer.”
Devil: “What if you’re wrong?”
Norm: “Wrong?”
Devil: “Yeah, what if you’re wrong about there being no Heaven or Hell? What if you’re wrong about the existence of God and the Devil? You must have at least a little bit of doubt in that cold, black heart of yours.”
Norm: “What? Where do you get that cold, black heart shit? My heart is warmed by love and goodness.”
Devil: “Love and goodness? You? Well, I know that’s bullshit, but I was just yanking your chain. What’s the matter? Can’t you take a joke?
Norm: “Okay, you got me good that time, Dev.”
Devil: “Your temper makes you an easy get, jokewise. A word of advice, if I may - you’re going to have to work on that temper, if you plan on getting into Heaven. Hahahaha! Bet you didn’t know I was so hi-larious! But, seriously, you didn’t answer the question. What if you are wrong about the existence of God and me?”
Norm: “I have no doubt that I’m right. However, on the off chance I am wrong, then I guess I’ll be seeing a lot of you throughout eternity, Dev.”
Devil: “Oh, I’ll be waiting for you, Norm. You can count on it.”
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Do you have something to say about A Conversation With the Devil? Well, then . . .
I think Love is good, and if you love, you must be good, if you really mean it. But, then, man wrote a book about love and said it could be abused. That is a problem for me. I think mankind, who wrote this book, wrote it for his ideal life here on earth. It gives him great power over other genders and animals and living thngs, whatever else they might be, you know, ETs and such. So now there is a man standing at the head of our country changing all the rules to fit his life. He plays 'love games', but he has no conception of love. He thrives on hatred, retaliation and anger and attacking good people who only mean to love and live in peace. So I can't believe in a book that puts me below mankind because I am a woman. No one here should be second class to anyone else. That includes animals in my book. This earth is a tough place to get through when you always feel lesser than others that feel superior to you. The glass ceiling is a place for "others". I'm frankly, tired of living under it. Love needs to be for everyone. The heart is a fragile piece of equipment. It must be treated better by all in order for us to succeed and survive in this beautiful space. Trust me, if you are born an Aquarian. you are always behind the eight ball, all that goes with kindness is hope...and we can spend our whole life hoping....and we Do spend our whole life hoping.....If only Kindness prevailed.....
Devilishly clever. That convo sounds very familiar. You may be interested in my coming post tomorrow morning.
Watch out for tecolote42, she’s wise beyond our years. 😉😎