Desperately Searching For the Bright Side
Winter Sucks
I hate being cold. Sometimes, I’ll be all layered up and under several blankets, and I’ll still be cold. I hate that. In fact, if there is a Hell, for me it would be a cold, gray, freezing, bone-chilling, dreary kind of place. I’m going to be just fine if I wind up somewhere hot.
Snow sport enthusiasts may disagree, but I believe winter is the most depressing time of the year. I have found myself kind of moping around off and on during this miserable winter, and I think the cold has a lot to do with it.
I should acknowledge that “cold” is a relative term. What’s “cold” for me where I live is not the same as “cold” where it really is cold, with ice and snow up to your ears, and below zero temperatures. No, where I live, I consider it cold when the highs are in the 50s and the lows are in the 30s. I should also acknowledge that I am a big whiny baby when it comes to being cold.
Anyway, in hopes of breaking myself out of this wintry, cold-weather mopefest, I am going to attempt something that is completely foreign to me. It is a “desperate times call for desperate measures” type of situation. I, an avowed believer in the power of negative thinking, am going to actively search for the bright side of being ensnared in the insidious gloom of winter.
Okay, how about this? With each bleak, somber passing day of this, the most lamentable of the seasons, I am one glorious day closer to spring and summer. Right on! (As we’d say in the olden days.) That is some positive, optimistic, bright side thinking right off the bat. So, maybe I can do this and not be such a Negative Norm after all.
I just thought of another positive. Baseball spring training will be starting soon. The whole baseball season is ahead of us. There are 30 MLB teams, and each one thinks this might be the year in which they catch lightning in a bottle and make a long run into the postseason, and with a little luck, wind up in the World Series.
Even my team, the Pittsburgh Pirates, will experience the optimism of spring. They have had their usual thrifty offseason, dumpster-diving through the rejects from other teams, doing next to nothing to stoke a feeling of hope among fans of this moribund franchise. Nevertheless, thanks to the imminent arrival of spring, hope abounds. Who knows, maybe they will be better this year. Perhaps the Pirates will shock the world this season with their baseball prowess and winning ways. How about that for some optimistic Spring Talk?
In the midst of a frigid, unforgiving winter, I can look forward to cleaning up the yard in the spring. Well, I guess I do not enjoy the actual work of cleaning up the yard, but I very much enjoy how the yard looks after it has been cleaned up. Getting rid of the debris from several months of cold, inclement weather makes the yard look wonderful. My wife has done an incredible job of turning our backyard into a green, garden oasis. My jobs are to dig holes, raking (I’m an excellent raker), and general clean up. So, while I do not enjoy the work, I do look forward to the finished product.
Also, I am keen to see the trees and plants sprout new growth as the weather warms. It is a big event around our house to spot signs of life in the yard. It shows we did our job over the winter by keeping the plants alive. We have several containers of old sheets and bedspreads and towels we use to cover as many of our plants as we can whenever we have freezing temperatures in our area. Sometimes we lose a few to Old Man Winter, that old bastard, but we usually save most of them.
At this time of year, the most exciting thing we have to look forward to is the emergence of our tortoise, Lily, from her wintry slumber. She usually comes out in mid to late April, after spring has sprung. (She’s a smart girl.) To us, when Lily emerges, it is way more of an important event than when that overrated rodent sees or doesn’t see its shadow in Punxsutawney, Pennsylvania. One of us will spot her outside of her palatial tortoise estate and cry, “Lily’s out!” I should definitely remember this fantastic highlight of spring when I am gripped by the cold weather mopes.
Another positive of the cooler temps is that our cats are a little more snuggly than they are when it is warm. Our house can be a bit chilly in the winter. We keep the thermostat at 69 and we wear our sweatshirts and sweaters to keep warm as needed. And, my wife has made several lovely quilts for us to use when we feel especially chilled.
I am aware that Chester and Pearl sometimes use our body heat to warm themselves. But, that’s okay. I just pretend they snuggle with me because they love me. We each get what we want. It’s a win-win.
If I were of a more philosophical bent, I would view winter as a necessary time that allows me to truly appreciate the warmer seasons. I don’t know, though, I kind of think that’s a crock. I see it this way: I do not need the pain of being punched in the nose to appreciate how good my nose feels when it has not been punched. And, I do not need to freeze my ass off to appreciate when my ass is warm and toasty.
So, to sum it up, I can conquer the doldrums of winter by looking forward to the warmth and sense of renewal provided by the arrival of spring. Heck, now that I have written this little essay in my search for the bright side, I’m feeling better already. Thanks to all my readers and subscribers for giving me a reason to do it.
I completely agree! And I would much prefer to perish by heatstroke than by frostbite complications.