I read the TML substack and Paul Daugherty oftentimes states that "I might have been "wr........."...."wr........" but he never really admits to being incorrect. He has been strong in his convictions and just refuses to admit to defeat. I must say, Norm, this is a big step for you, I bet. Somehow you passed a threshhold to admit you may possibly been wrong once or twice in your life. What's interesting in doing this, as I see it, it is like kicking a hornets nest and now your brain is bringing up those "wr......." memories and turning them into monsters. However, it is good fodder to write about. I'm here to say, I'm sorry that happened. I hope you can find a memory blocker soon to stop your nightmares. Let me tell you, "aging" may be the one blessing that saves you from these nightmares.
Actually, Kate, admitting my occasional wrongness has been quite liberating. It’s tough to hold oneself to a standard of perfection all the time. My brain is not always my friend, but in this case, I am monster and nightmare free. You may be wondering, “What about the demons?” Well, I’m working on those . . . 😊
I so understand the force ingrained in us to maintain a "power of perfection". I think it is very closely connected to being compulsive....very much so, indeed. That's where my demons live.
There are few things I admire more than a humble man. It is a breath of fresh air in this day and age. Also, there are few things I disdain more than a conceited man who talks about how wonderful he is. I guess that's why I can't stand Donald Trump.
Being able to admit to being wrong shows strength instead of weakness. It shows a moment of self realization and an admission to striving to becoming a better person. This is what is sorely lacking in our society right now. These blowhards who are in charge never admit that they are F*ing everything up. They double down when they are called out. They refuse to course correct. Instead, they willingly hit the iceberg like the Titanic and cheer putting everyone's life at risk as the ship is sinking.
I applaud you for your self reflection and honesty. I think all of us would be better people if we learned how to own our mistakes and strive to be better humans.
As you know, I am studying to become a mental health counselor. And the first thing I am learning is I am expected to do a lot of self reflection to understand my own strengths and weaknesses in order to be of help to others. It has been eye opening and quite a surprise.
Thank you, Sarah. It took me a long time to accept that I didn’t have to have all the answers to everything, and that screwing up or being wrong about this or that, did not mean the world would come to an end. I wish I could have realized that years ago. I could have avoided a lot of angst. I still expect a lot of myself, but expecting perfection is a losing strategy.
Hope you’ve been getting your hands good and dirty!
The interesting thing is I have had the opposite issue. I second guess everything that I do. It took me a long time to accept that I can make sound decisions and follow through with them. But, on the other hand, I had to learn that my expectation of others is too high. I expected people to step up and do the right thing. I have to say that was a hard lesson to learn.
I have been in working in the garden over the past couple of weeks. This weekend I have it on my To-Do list to build a raised garden. The plants I started indoors are getting big enough to transplant. And this is the best time of year to buy flowers for the garden. Everything is blooming and it makes me very happy.
I read the TML substack and Paul Daugherty oftentimes states that "I might have been "wr........."...."wr........" but he never really admits to being incorrect. He has been strong in his convictions and just refuses to admit to defeat. I must say, Norm, this is a big step for you, I bet. Somehow you passed a threshhold to admit you may possibly been wrong once or twice in your life. What's interesting in doing this, as I see it, it is like kicking a hornets nest and now your brain is bringing up those "wr......." memories and turning them into monsters. However, it is good fodder to write about. I'm here to say, I'm sorry that happened. I hope you can find a memory blocker soon to stop your nightmares. Let me tell you, "aging" may be the one blessing that saves you from these nightmares.
Actually, Kate, admitting my occasional wrongness has been quite liberating. It’s tough to hold oneself to a standard of perfection all the time. My brain is not always my friend, but in this case, I am monster and nightmare free. You may be wondering, “What about the demons?” Well, I’m working on those . . . 😊
I so understand the force ingrained in us to maintain a "power of perfection". I think it is very closely connected to being compulsive....very much so, indeed. That's where my demons live.
Hi Norm,
There are few things I admire more than a humble man. It is a breath of fresh air in this day and age. Also, there are few things I disdain more than a conceited man who talks about how wonderful he is. I guess that's why I can't stand Donald Trump.
Being able to admit to being wrong shows strength instead of weakness. It shows a moment of self realization and an admission to striving to becoming a better person. This is what is sorely lacking in our society right now. These blowhards who are in charge never admit that they are F*ing everything up. They double down when they are called out. They refuse to course correct. Instead, they willingly hit the iceberg like the Titanic and cheer putting everyone's life at risk as the ship is sinking.
I applaud you for your self reflection and honesty. I think all of us would be better people if we learned how to own our mistakes and strive to be better humans.
As you know, I am studying to become a mental health counselor. And the first thing I am learning is I am expected to do a lot of self reflection to understand my own strengths and weaknesses in order to be of help to others. It has been eye opening and quite a surprise.
Have a great weekend!
Thank you, Sarah. It took me a long time to accept that I didn’t have to have all the answers to everything, and that screwing up or being wrong about this or that, did not mean the world would come to an end. I wish I could have realized that years ago. I could have avoided a lot of angst. I still expect a lot of myself, but expecting perfection is a losing strategy.
Hope you’ve been getting your hands good and dirty!
Hi Norm,
The interesting thing is I have had the opposite issue. I second guess everything that I do. It took me a long time to accept that I can make sound decisions and follow through with them. But, on the other hand, I had to learn that my expectation of others is too high. I expected people to step up and do the right thing. I have to say that was a hard lesson to learn.
I have been in working in the garden over the past couple of weeks. This weekend I have it on my To-Do list to build a raised garden. The plants I started indoors are getting big enough to transplant. And this is the best time of year to buy flowers for the garden. Everything is blooming and it makes me very happy.
Take care!